School’s Out!

By Barbara Ashcroft B.A.M.ED.

Now the fun begins. The first few days bring excitement and joy as the children love their new freedom. It won’t take long though until you hear the “B” word, “I’m bored.”

It is wise to keep a few challenging, but fun, educational activities on hand for these times. With just one hour a day of incidental reading, writing, discussion and math activities, your child will keep up his basic skills and increase his general knowledge. Learning is a lifelong ongoing process and is certainly not limited to just the school setting. There are many ways to keep your child’s mind active during the summer.

Math websites offer basic skills practice and an assortment of games.

Crossword puzzle books or online word puzzles sharpen vocabulary and assist with spelling.

Short daily story writing or reporting and editing on the computer will keep up their written expression fluency and accuracy.

Current events from daily newscasts or newspapers offer great opportunities for a family discussion of social issues and values. They also provide an opportunity for incidental geography learning.

Keep short stories or articles pertaining to your child’s hobbies and interests on hand. This will keep up her reading skills. Let her tell you what new information she has discovered.

Family outings and summer trips provide occasions to learn about new surroundings and local history. Encourage your child to become a keen observer and to ask probing questions as you travel to new and different locations. Traveling to new places can be one of the best learning experiences for a child.

Nature walks, museum and science centre visits all stimulate inquiring minds. It’s the “Why” questions that show interest and lead to further research.

Post an interesting daily research question on the fridge. Help your children sharpen their research skills. They need help refining their key search words.

All of these activities can be done informally and incidentally as your family goes about enjoying the summer break. Learning is natural and can be fun when the whole family gets involved.

When children know you are enthusiastic about a topic, they will pick up that interest. Keep them challenged, curious, and motivated. The “B” word might just disappear.

Some educational and fun sites for kids:
http://www.math.com/
http://www.coolmath.com/
www.kidzone.ws/math/index.htm
http://www.askforkids.com/
www.cbc.ca/kids
http://school.discovery.com/students
http://www.funology.com/
http://www.kidsclick.org/
www.pbskids.org/findit/
www.sikids.com/

Journey to Joy for Parents
http://www.barbashcroft.com/

Permission for reprint of this article is given with the inclusion of this statement:
Barb Ashcroft offers Journey to Seminars and private consultation for those who want to think more positively, discover their true passions, and feel fully alive. She may also be booked for professional speaking engagements. Contact Barb 905 814-6434 barb@barbashcroft.com

Why Are Our Children So Restless?

By Barbara Ashcroft B.A.M.ED.

Today's children grow up in a fast-paced society. They are bombarded with thousands of visual images flashing simultaneously in front of their eyes. From cartoons to action films and video and computer games they receive ongoing rapid visual and audio stimuli. With the remote control they quickly learn to channel surf, watch two shows at once, and tune out. Extremely loud music from headsets and speakers pierces their eardrums. Advertisers entice them with bigger and better gadgets and toys. They are surrounded with overwhelming choices and distractions at a young age. Family life has become hectic and over-scheduled. We may not be able to completely alter their environment, but we can become aware of its effect on our children and set up some strategies to offset all this over-stimulation.

The Effect on our Children

Many children have a hard time settling down, focusing and listening when they have been over-stimulated by so much sensory input.

Their ability to focus and concentrate on a quiet demanding task has decreased.

Children have become used to being entertained externally by this type of stimuli and have lost touch with using their own imaginations. They are always expecting action-packed entertainment and thrills. Heard the word “bored” lately?

Listening skills have almost become a lost art.

Getting to sleep has become more difficult.

Our children are beginning to expect everything in life to be “instant”; consequently, they have little patience.

Hearing impairments are becoming more prevalent.

What Can We Do?

Make sure your children have some daily quiet calm-down time. (reading a favourite book, listening to an audio book, working quietly on a hands-on hobby, watching an inspirational movie, having individual special talk times with Mom or Dad, even short meditation to reflective music.)

Encourage imaginative play, creative hobbies and reading.

Let them know that you also have to take quiet breaks.

Share with them how you focus on long boring tasks and follow through.

Monitor the amount of time they are involved in over-stimulating activities.

Develop listening skills through the use of listening games. (75% of their classroom day requires listening)

Play some soft, quiet, reflective background music.

Create predictable consistent structures and routines that keep your child emotionally safe and secure.

Limit their choices and see that those choices are age-appropriate.

Make sure that your child is getting enough sleep to be able to listen and focus at school the next day.

Try to keep your own voice calm and soft even while you discipline.

Turn down the speaker volume. Protect their ear drums.

Schedule family down time and guard it with your life.

Slow down, pause and breathe!!!


Journey to Joy for Parents
http://www.barbashcroft.com/

Permission for reprint of this article is given with the inclusion of this statement:
Barb Ashcroft offers Journey to Seminars and private consultation for those who want to think more positively, discover their true passions, and feel fully alive. She may also be booked for professional speaking engagements. Contact Barb 905 814-6434 barb@barbashcroft.com

Discover Your True Passions in Life

By Barbara Ashcroft B.A.M.ED.

“There are two great days
in a person’s life-
the day we are born
and the day we discover why.”
Wm. Barclay

Four out of five people are not passionate about what they are doing in life. Is your life fulfilling? Are you passionate about what you do? Do you feel that you live a purposeful life? Are you in touch with what really makes your heart sing? What dream do you want to start creating today? When you follow your passions, you will love your life. Your dreams already exist. They are just waiting for you to find them…to bring them into the world.

Sometimes we get so caught up in our same old, same old, that we lose sight of what really matters to us, what motivates us and touches our soul. Busyness and daily routine take over and then we die. Life has a way of happening with or without your consent. There are no reruns. Most people, on their death beds, do not regret their mistakes, but their lost opportunities. The good news is that it doesn’t matter what age you are. There is always time to get in touch with your passions…better late than never. If you ask yourself how many good years you think you might have to live on this planet, you get a sense of how important it is to make these years purposeful. Why would you waste one day spending your valuable time doing what is not feeding your soul? What truly gives you meaning? If today were your last day to live, what would not be fulfilled in you?

If you think that you can’t identify your passions and gifts, think back to your early years. What were your hobbies and interests? What do others usually compliment you on? What talents do others recognize in you? What feedback does the universe give you? What are you doing when time seems to fly by? When do you feel light as a feather, content and at peace? The answers to these questions will tell you what is close to your heart. This, then, is what you need to go after.

Even if you aren’t able to spend your whole day in your bliss, you must find time to nourish yourself with those things about which you are passionate. Your body cries out for it. In fact your body will rebel if you do not use your natural talents and gifts.

Stress, physical ailments and depression often set in when our authentic selves are buried for the sake of security.

If you are struggling to identify your true passions, The Passion TestTM is an incredibly valuable tool for clarifying what’s really important to you in your life. It provides you with a systematic way to identify those things that truly bring you joy. The test is very personal and will provide wonderful insights for any age. Begin to feel excited and motivated about your purpose. Greet each day with energy and enthusiasm. Get in touch with your true destiny.
Join a Passion TestTM Seminar or take the two-session private program. You will be amazed at how clear your life focus will become. When you discover your true passions, focus on your special gifts, and add your uniqueness to the lives of others, your life will be enriched.

“When you are clear, what you want will show up in your life,
but, only to the extent you are clear.”
Janet Attwood

The Passion Test is a trademark of Enlightened Alliances created by Janet and Chris Attwood.
Barb Ashcroft is a certified Passion Test facilitator.

Journey to Joy
http://www.barbashcroft.com/

Permission for reprint of this article is given with the inclusion of this statement:
Barb Ashcroft offers Journey to Seminars and private consultation for those who want to think more positively, discover their true passions, and feel fully alive. She may also be booked for professional speaking engagements. Contact Barb 905 814-6434 barb@barbashcroft.com

Love Those Grandkids!

By Barbara Ashcroft B.A.M.ED.

“Few things are more delightful than grandchildren fighting over your lap.”
Doug Larson

What a great time of life! Finally get to play again, dress up, get down on the floor for games (on my good days), giggle, tell knock knock jokes, take in a Disney movie and then send them home! Can’t get much better than this. Grandkids light up your life. They bring out the kid in you, think you’re cool, love you unconditionally, and don’t mind listening to your stories over and over again. They brighten your day when you’re feeling down. They even “cheer” when you drop in. They make great welcoming committees.

According to the Vanier Institute of the Family, older Canadians (76% of those 65 and older) have grandchildren, and most have more than one. Today’s grandparents live longer and experience a longer duration of grandparenthood than ever before. Many grandparents live into their grandchildren’s adulthood. Grandparenting is another opportunity for us to connect, build relationships and make a difference in the lives of others.

Grandparents can be a wonderful influence in the lives of their grandchildren. We may provide additional adult role models for them, act as resources for information, give practical advice based on true life experiences, provide them with a sense of family history and continuity and become their confidants. We can also tell them some pretty hilarious historical tales about their own parents which they love to hear.

A grandparent may be a great emotional support to a grandchild. With our lives now hopefully less hurried, we are able to offer quality listening time to the growing child, and provide ongoing encouragement and assistance with their schoolwork, their social issues and their insecurities. Grandparents make great cheerleaders. They can foster the child’s positive qualities, and show a little more patience with them, since they don’t have to spend their whole day with them. Even grandparents who do not live in close proximity to their grandchildren may keep up a close relationship through a continual communication exchange. It’s the constant interest and support shown that counts. If we establish positive relationships with our grandchildren in their early years, and keep the open communication going, this bond may continue into the teenage years when a third party ear and respected voice may be very helpful as the adolescents begin to assert their independence. These same teenagers can also keep us up to date with new trends and changing cultural ways.

Becoming a grandparent involves a great deal of personal growth. Grandparents can sometimes get themselves into trouble with the parents. There really is no manual for grandparenting. When your first grandchild is born, you just want to get your hands on that beautiful baby. You forget that this little one is not yours. This can be especially difficult for grandmothers. One really never stops being a mother. It can be quite a confusing time trying to figure out your new role. New mothers need support, but may be very sensitive to any suggestions that grandmothers make as they may perceive the suggestions as criticism. Parenting practices and styles, as well, change over the years and the generations may view child rearing quite differently. Most grandparents want to help, but often may be confused as to how to do this without potential conflict. The Vanier Institute notes that “the grandparent role is characterized by complexity. In a sense it is more complex than being a parent because it involves more people (adult children and children-in-law, as well as another set of grandparents).” It appears that there really is no clear description for the role of a grandparent and that most “individuals negotiate roles within a wide range of possibilities.” (J. Rosenthal & J. Gladstone, 2000)

The best role for grandparents to play is one of support, both for their adult children who are now parents and also for the new grandchildren. It takes time to adjust to the new role and to work out how that support can best be provided to meet the needs of everyone. Let the parents know you are there and then wait to be asked. Some grandparents today may find themselves in a primary caretaking role for their grandchildren. Most grandparents, however, don’t seek out this role, but agree to provide this level of support out of some financial difficulties being experienced by the parents.

Grandparents can be an inspiration to their grandchildren. When my own grandmother was on her deathbed, I remember telling her that I wanted to be just like her some day. She had a very independent spirit, great drive, and always found a way to overcome life’s hurdles. Her photo is a constant daily reminder to me of that strength and attitude that I so often have to call on. My own children valued the time they spent with their grandparents. They often speak about Grandpa’s laugh, his gentle spirit and his woodworking toy projects. My son became very close to my Mom when she was in her wheelchair for nine years, as he lifted and toted her around in his car. My daughter use to keep her paternal grandmother company on many occasions when she was alone. It is this contact with older grandparents that also provides the younger generation with a sense of respect for the aging process.

Grandchildren give us a sense of immortality as we think of our personal and family line being continued through them. This is a comforting thought as we begin to think about what legacy we will leave to the world. In the meantime, grab as many hugs and cuddles as you can get and don’t miss this great opportunity to get silly, play like a kid again, go to the park, eat ice cream, swing on the swings and then send them home to their parents! Enjoy a soothing cup of tea, in your own peaceful and quiet space, smile and be thankful for the wonderful gift of your grandkids.


Journey to Joy
http://www.barbashcroft.com/

Permission for reprint of this article is given with the inclusion of this statement:
Barb Ashcroft offers Journey to Seminars and private consultation for those who want to think more positively, discover their true passions, and feel fully alive. She may also be booked for professional speaking engagements. Contact Barb 905 814-6434 barb@barbashcroft.com















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Who Did You Use to Be?

By Barbara Ashcroft B.A.M.ED.


Are you really in touch with your authentic self? We all start out in life with longings and interests that often get pushed aside for what we call "life". What was it that stirred your heart at 6, 10, and 15? Do you even remember? What were your childhood aspirations? Have they been buried so long that you can't even recall them?
In her book, Something More, Sarah Ban Breathnach encourages us to become our authentic selves. She points out that our lives at this moment are a direct result of choices we made once upon a time. "Conscious choice is creative, the heart of authenticity-unconscious choice is how we end up living other people's lives."
Sometimes we make choices based upon what we think we should be doing, what our parents wanted us to become, what society has encouraged us to pursue, what we feel we need to do to gain prestige, power and status, and of course we chase after the best job that will afford us the luxuries of our consumer-oriented materialistic culture.

But have you ever asked yourself what truly brings you joy? Something more is needed to fill our spiritual hunger. We often feel that something crucial is missing, but can't figure out what it is. What is it that will fill this sense of emptiness? Sarah suggests we ask ourselves, "If I died tonight, what would I regret not having done today? If we are to lead deep, rich, fulfilling lives that are anchored in what's important, what's precious, what's real, so that our souls can soar, passion must fuel our flight."

Are you settling for a passive, rather than a passionate life? We often lose ourselves little by little, day by day settling for "something else" instead of Something More. Sarah reminds us that, "each one of us has enough power embedded in our being to set the world on fire." Many of us have that "someday" syndrome. Someday I'll write a book. Someday I'll start my own business. Someday I'll take up piano. Elizabeth Kubler Ross points out, "when you live as if you'll live forever, it becomes too easy to postpone the things you know you must do."
Someday comes sooner than later.
The Passion Test will help you identify your "someday" projects. You will get a real sense of what you personally value and hope to accomplish in this life-even it seems out of the question.


"It's a funny thing about life. If you refuse to settle for anything less than the best, that's what it will give you."

W. Somerset Maugham

The Passion Test TM is a trademark of Enlightened Alliances created by Janet and Chris Attwood.

Permission for reprint of this article is given with the inclusion of this statement:
Barb Ashcroft offers Journey to Seminars and private consultation for those who want to think more positively, discover their true passions, and feel fully alive. She may also be booked for professional speaking engagements. Contact Barb 905 814-6434 barb@barbashcroft.com

That Joyful Feeling

By Barbara Ashcroft B.A. M.ED.

Dr. M. Colgrove states that, “Joy is the Feeling of Grinning on the Inside.” Do you have that feeling? It’s the most pleasing and comforting feeling in the world. It’s peace. It’s excitement. It’s contentment. It’s hopeful and it’s always present. When you wake up in the morning, is this how you feel? Pay attention to those first morning thoughts; they are very revealing. They will tell you if you are experiencing joy in your life. Are you excited to greet the day? Do you look forward to all of its opportunities and experiences? Are you wondering where you will get the time to complete all your interesting projects and connect with your dearest friends? Or, do you view the day as another long, boring, heavy, unfulfilling burden? Listen carefully to those early rising thoughts; they tell us so much about our current state of mind.

Many people are living their lives in a dull, monotonous, and joyless zone. They find their days long and empty; they feel their lives are without purpose and their only conversation is about the past. They are consumed by life’s hurts and hold on to their deep seated resentments and anger. They have no passion for the day or hope for the future.

So where do you see yourself in this scenario? Would you like to greet the day with energy and enthusiasm? Would you like that quiet sense of inner satisfaction and peace at the end of the day? Would you like to experience more joy in your life?

If we look at how these optimistic and happy folks do it, we may be surprised to find out that their joyful spirit comes from within. It is mostly a matter of attitude and a particular way of looking at all of life’s experiences that makes the great difference.

Joyful people love and respect themselves. They delight in simply being who they are right now. They feel worthy of all the good things that life has to offer. They know that we are all born with a full cup of joy and with a sense of self love. They rise above all the external attacks on their self esteem and hold on tightly to their authentic selves.

Joyful people let go of the past. They free themselves from pent-up resentment, pain, anger and guilt. They forgive themselves and others. They know that holding on to anger and dwelling on past hurts only holds them back and prevents them from moving on. They allow themselves a grieving period and get on with life. They know that all that happens to them is part of life’s journey and they look forward to newer and more pleasant experiences.

Joyful people keep their thoughts positive. When they find their minds drifting into negative thinking, they pay attention to their uncomfortable emotional response and put a fast stop to these thoughts. They view all of life’s miserable moments as lessons to be learned and are constantly asking themselves, “What did I learn from this?” They know there is often very little one can do about a tragic or negative life happening, but they realize they have a choice when it comes to how they respond to each event. They make a conscious decision to learn the lesson and move forward.

Joyful people discover their true passions in life and find ways to live them out. They know what inspires them and what makes their hearts sing. They recognize the feeling of elation that springs forth when they are all-consumed in an activity where they are using their special gifts. They know instinctively that they need to do more of this and they find a way to let their unique talents shine.

Joyful people are risk takers and are not afraid of failure. They move out of their comfort zones, get excited and get going. They acknowledge their fears, reach out for support, take a deep breath and embark on the first step to a new venture. They know that staying stuck in the past will not bring fulfillment. They are very aware that life is short and they want to make sure that they take hold of all opportunities sent their way.

Joyful people believe in a Power greater than themselves. They trust and have faith in this Power to guide and support them through unexpected crises. They know they do not walk alone. They take time for quiet reflection and listen closely to this inner source of Power. Their faith brings them peace and tranquility. They express gratitude every day for all their blessings. They always see their cup half full.

Finally, joyful people do not look externally for anyone or anything to bring them happiness. They do this for themselves. When was the last time someone knocked at your door to bring you a box of joy? How long will you keep waiting for this delivery? Only you have the power to make your life more joyful. It’s right there waiting for you. Look within…it’s an inside job.

Journey to Joy

http://www.barbashcroft.com/

Permission for reprint of this article is given with the inclusion of this statement:
Barb Ashcroft offers Journey to Seminars and private consultation for those who want to think more positively, discover their true passions, and feel fully alive. She may also be booked for professional speaking engagements. Contact Barb 905 814-6434 barb@barbashcroft.com